I actually love your tumblr, I've been casually stalking it for the past several months. Just thought I'd, you know, let you know in a non-creepy way... (Yes I am aware this is not a question, apologies.)
Hey, thanks! I’ve got a main tumblr as well, which is where I post more stuff than just pictures. Music, videos, movie reviews, some personal rants (but very few). So this is me whoring it out to you! http://spacecricket.tumblr.com
Demands on women, and what happens when we meet them.
BE SEXY - But not too sexy, or else you’re a “slut.”
BE MODEST - But don’t, you prude.
BE FORGIVING - Basically, if you complain about the same thing twice (because it hasn’t changed) you’re a bitch.
BE THOUGHTFUL - Oh my god, you try too hard.
BE VULNERABLE - And take this emotional beating.
BE HARDWORKING - And hope they’ll take you seriously.
BE SEXUALLY EXPERIENCED - Her prowess is suspicious.
BE VIRGINAL - And no one will want to “deal with” being your first.
BE PRETTY - You must be a bimbo.
BE SMART - You must be frigid.
BE STRONG - Brush off the sexism. Brush off the patriarchy. Brush it off, because it’s “not a big deal.”
BE BREEZY - She’s such a flake.
BE FLIRTY - This is what girls have to be in place of friendly.
BE TRENDY - Blend in. Be faceless.
BE ATHLETIC - What a dyke.
BE FRAIL - Like a model, but now you’re too bony.
BE ENDEARINGLY NERDY - And by that, we mean wear cute glasses, not “enjoy Star Wars.”
BE SKINNY - But you have to have impossibly disproportionate curves.
BE CURVY - You’re a whale.
BE FASHIONABLE - And risk being told you’re “asking for” male attention.
BE CASUAL - She’s a slob.
BE AFFECTIONATE - You’re too clingy.
BE SWEET - She’s such a child.
BE A TOMBOY - She’s not feminine enough.
BE GIRLY - She’s not relatable.
BE SOCIAL - What an attention-whore.
BE SOFT-SPOKEN - She’s so boring.
BE OUTSPOKEN - But not at the boys, because your problems aren’t theirs.
BE SILLY - I can’t take her seriously.
BE SERIOUS - She doesn’t know how to laugh.
BE AN ACTIVIST - She’s too high-strung.
BE LOW-MAINTENANCE - Get walked over. Get ignored. Get taken advantage of.
BE FUNNY - Just kidding; it’s widely accepted that girls aren’t funny.
BE SENSITIVE - But don’t cry.
BE “ONE OF THE GUYS” - Because guys shouldn’t have to sink to being “one of the girls.”
BE HEALTHY - Hate your body; it’s not good enough.
BE PATIENT - Not that you’re worth patience, yourself.
BE GRATEFUL - Girls and guys are TOTALLY equal these days! You can vote!
This is not to say that I think boys don’t have their own set of standards to live up to. They are put under a lot of pressure too; there are fewer ways to be “masculine” than there are to be “feminine.” They are expected to adhere to their gender-norms even more than we are.
But we still have the short end of the stick, guys. If we fail to achieve even one of the aforementioned qualities, we aren’t good enough. Even if we reach all of them, you can see there are drawbacks we might bring on ourselves by doing so.
Not all men have these expectations. But society sure wants them to. And society wants us to think it’s okay. It’s not.